The Mysterious
Sep. 3rd, 2005 11:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
birthrightgreenHave you ever experienced something you couldn’t explain? Write down your brushes with the mysterious.
Experienced, no. But observed...yes.
Love.
I live in a world where magic, Craft, reigns supreme. The Blood rely on their Craft, their power for almost everything, even things that landens seem to find simple like cooking and putting on shoes.
My family is considered by many to be mysterious, but there are not unexplainable. They are as they are. Where once I may have balked at the name of the High Lord, and far more at the Priest of the Hourglass, he now is just Uncle Saetan. He is a deep well and complex and the tiers of his soul extend deeper into the Darkness than I care to plunge, but I seen nothing unexplainable there.
But love. Love I find I do not understand. Not as it is in Kaeleer.
I understand friendship. I am beginning to understand family. Slowly.
I understand love in it's familial form. I love Daemon. I love Jaenelle. I love Titian and Tersa. I am coming to love Uncle Saetan and even Lucivar and Marian and the coven. I would die to protect any of them.
But it is not this love I'm speaking of. The love between Daemona and Jaenelle. That between Lucivar and Marian. Between Morghann and Khary. The love that...binds people together...
I see it. I can see how they react to each other, how they are torn apart when they are separated or fighting. How they feel the others' highs and lows. So much of what I know about relationships between females and males, however, comes from my other observations. How females belittled males, and males, in turn, belittled the whores with no status to make them bow. The simmering resentment. The jealousy, that was over favor, not love. Terreille carries a poison that Kaeleer has only felt the faintest taste of. Yet despite that, Daemon and Lucivar have found it in them to love.
Despite centuries of mistreatment at the hands of Queens, they now kneel willingly to serve. And yes, Marian and Jaenelle are more than worthy of being served. I am honored to be in Jaenelle's service. But it is more than Protocol.
They love. Love with a fierceness I never knew Daemon was capable of. A devotion I would have laughed had someone told me of it a mere two decades ago.
I don't understand this power. This feeling. This...desperation for the touch, the presence of another. A specific other. It doesn't make sense. Where does it come from? How can you feel it when all you have seen is the baser part of the nature of the opposite sex? I have...the things I allowed...what my profession demanded...
And yet, to have a...a lover. To take him as such. To play with the possibility of...more to come than the physical exhilaration of pleasing and being pleased, of excellence in bedroom games...
It is frightening. And daunting. And I do not understand it.
But I want to.
Experienced, no. But observed...yes.
Love.
I live in a world where magic, Craft, reigns supreme. The Blood rely on their Craft, their power for almost everything, even things that landens seem to find simple like cooking and putting on shoes.
My family is considered by many to be mysterious, but there are not unexplainable. They are as they are. Where once I may have balked at the name of the High Lord, and far more at the Priest of the Hourglass, he now is just Uncle Saetan. He is a deep well and complex and the tiers of his soul extend deeper into the Darkness than I care to plunge, but I seen nothing unexplainable there.
But love. Love I find I do not understand. Not as it is in Kaeleer.
I understand friendship. I am beginning to understand family. Slowly.
I understand love in it's familial form. I love Daemon. I love Jaenelle. I love Titian and Tersa. I am coming to love Uncle Saetan and even Lucivar and Marian and the coven. I would die to protect any of them.
But it is not this love I'm speaking of. The love between Daemona and Jaenelle. That between Lucivar and Marian. Between Morghann and Khary. The love that...binds people together...
I see it. I can see how they react to each other, how they are torn apart when they are separated or fighting. How they feel the others' highs and lows. So much of what I know about relationships between females and males, however, comes from my other observations. How females belittled males, and males, in turn, belittled the whores with no status to make them bow. The simmering resentment. The jealousy, that was over favor, not love. Terreille carries a poison that Kaeleer has only felt the faintest taste of. Yet despite that, Daemon and Lucivar have found it in them to love.
Despite centuries of mistreatment at the hands of Queens, they now kneel willingly to serve. And yes, Marian and Jaenelle are more than worthy of being served. I am honored to be in Jaenelle's service. But it is more than Protocol.
They love. Love with a fierceness I never knew Daemon was capable of. A devotion I would have laughed had someone told me of it a mere two decades ago.
I don't understand this power. This feeling. This...desperation for the touch, the presence of another. A specific other. It doesn't make sense. Where does it come from? How can you feel it when all you have seen is the baser part of the nature of the opposite sex? I have...the things I allowed...what my profession demanded...
And yet, to have a...a lover. To take him as such. To play with the possibility of...more to come than the physical exhilaration of pleasing and being pleased, of excellence in bedroom games...
It is frightening. And daunting. And I do not understand it.
But I want to.
